My Pink Shoelace

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Uhmm … how do I put this to words.

From Leyte, Sumilon, Baguio to Siargao … and thats where am currently located with people who mattered. Friends from work Eds, Jen, D and Julie (our host).

Am a web addict that I have no qualms of admitting I have been anxious to get online. The transition of my flight from Baguio to Siargao is just amazing … a span of 2 hours … imagine how rushed I felt .. (char!!)

Anyways … I dragged Eds (of soloflighted.com) with me to look for an internet cafe and here we are now …

Also photos from this “Surfing in Siargao Escapade” would be all thanks to him.

Details later … when I get home …

Not only is the rate way higher than normal … dang!!! I hate the mouse and the keyboard here.

Grrrr … CIAO peeps!!!

One of my many frustrations is understanding computer security and networking. A few of my colleagues are actually taking CISCO classes to satisfy their curiosity of the whole networking and security thingy. There are various schools in my area offering a course on it, accdg to them its per module and its difficult. Huhuhuhu … don’t have any educational background on techy stuff so am sure I’ll experience more than the regular nosebleed. Am still interested though … so interested that I ordered a used cisco router from TC Digital as they ship internationally. Going out and scouring the flea market does not have any appeal to me at all especially as I have no clue on the do’s and don’ts in purchasing a router. Am not sure on what I’ll do with it yet, my desktop is still not working … would probably purchase a new monitor for it but am notebook’s fine. Once my desktop’s up and running would do some experimentation on both computers with the router the moment it gets to me.

Am off to Baguio tomorrow and I cannot wait. I just need to get away from the office … somehow my emotions are always in turmoil when am there.

I have tried several diet pills and patches in an attempt to reach my ideal weight and the one that has caught my fancy now is the pill named Alli. It contains Orlistat, a drug that works like a sponge, it absorbs the fat from your daily food intake. The most common sudden-need-to-poop side effect in diet pills is also present in this one.

~ I was the only thorn amongst the roses ~

Its monday morning already I just got in after spending talk time with the boys and ma’am Soni … we were by the floating table talking about anything under the sun.

When I woke up Sunday morning around 6 AM I took my time to take photos of whatever I find interesting around the place which was numerous. The boys were still asleep on the other room and I dont expect them to wake up anytime soon, ’twas around 9:30 AM when they knocked on my door for breakfast or shall we say brunch. When that was done the four of us toured every section of the place took shots and videos of this and that.  Had a superb lunch by the clubhouse … their cook is just amazing … and at around 3PM ma’am Soni have us visit another resort on the next town so we’ll have basis for comparison. A good 15 to 20 minute drive, the place is huge they have like 3 hectares of beach front but only a small portion of it is developed … the only nice thing about it is the view which the four of us unanimously agree to be bliss.

They worked on the pc while I was busy roaming around the place observing the customers … finally we had dinner at ma’am Soni’s quarters which was huge … the food was superb and so was her company. No false pretense just plain honest conversation about the history of the place, her her family and the business.

We’re going home the following day, the boat leaves at 8:00 AM so we have to get up roughly at 6:00 AM … as we parted ways and head on to our rooms … Vince called my attention and asked if am going to sleep already … went over the floating table where they’re located and just like the previous night we talked over beer about anything under the sun.

‘Twas past midnight when we decided to call it a night, afterall we’re up early the morning after. So here I am in my room which was the by the way huge typing while watching Smith waiting for sleep to get hold of me.

Being with the boys is one hell of an experience, ’twas really nice of them to knock by my room inviting me to join them in the cottage me bringing my notebook and them one case of red horse. Me charging my phone and notebook; them talking over beer … am learning a lot a whole lot I should say. From politics to history to music to technology … here I am speechless like a sponge absorbing all the info I cannot gather from normal conversations with girls like me.

Never thought I could even open up about mom and how I lost her and how am dealing with it but it felt nice being able to deal with it with people I know from work but I don’t consider close.

They listened and somehow understood in ways I cannot describe plus I get to appreciate reggae music now … thanks to Vince who seems like a wikipedia on the go. The input I got from these people was something I didn’t see coming. And am glad for being here … for the company … for the change of scenery.

Its past 4 AM when we went back to our rooms am sure they’re prolly asleep by now but here I am awake … still on the go despite having no sleep at all … as am still technically fresh from work but there’s so much emotions … thoughts … ideas on my head that I cannot sleep with them burning incessantly. Later on we’d begin work as thats what basically am here for … not hard work mind you but more out of a hobby where I get paid and I get to see places. Well this is the start and hopefully there’s more to come.

Am currently typing this post on board the boat that would take us to Leyte to Hyd’s resort … while the boys (vince, hyds and jao) are busy talking about who knows what.

now let me recap last night

my last night at work was ok. agitating at the same time though … I asked D to transfer me to Pro the LOB I love the most being in three I basically have basis for my comparison. so I was in Pro for I dunno how long then was transferred back to TR as it was queuing with Victor calling on and off.

After 15 minutes of Knowlagent I was back on the phone with Victor in succession which was a funny change … refreshing in the sense after a series of complicated developer calls. Kept praying for VGH as I cannot wait to get home and start early on with my vacation.

Am s’pose to have lunch with Aisa and Mitchy before Mitchy leaves for Manila for her MDP and then at around 4:30 am s’pose to meet the peeps am going with to Leyte at IT Park as the boat taking us to Leyte leaves at 6:00 PM.

Now what happened was I was at home preparing to meet up with Mitchy and Aisa when Ash texted telling me we wont push through which came up as a surprise seeing that they havent texted me at all. So I lied low and was not disappointed at all because if they’d cancel out they would have told me right?

So I went to IT Park where they’re waiting for me and then we head on to Ayala and had lunch at Dessert Factory. I was agitated and bothered because of the text messages I got from she who must not be named which was contradicting to what Vince said when he called me. Accdg. to Vince we’d push through, we’d have to meet up at 2:30 PM at I2 Bldg. as we need be at Hyds place by 3:00 PM as the boat leaves at 4:30 PM. I’ve never felt so rushed my whole life all the whileI thought the boat would leave at 6:00 PM so we’d meet up at 4:30 PM, I didnt have time to look for another MMC and to get the pillow for Mitchy, I practically had to rush off all the way home threw in whatever I can grab from my dresser onto my bag, grabbed my notebook and set off informing my drunk uncle where am headed and when am back, asking our close neighbors to look after him and the house while am away.

I arrived at I2 way past 3PM, Jao and Vince were at Jobbee waiting for me and just a couple of minutes after I sat down, Hyd’s arrived with his ride that’ take us to the port. So here I am on board the boat with the boys …

Now the title kinda sounds harsh but when I received the succession of messages from her I can only imagine her face and the sound of her voice … ’twas enough to make me take pillow and cover my head with it. She reminds me of a banshee … though she doesnt shriek like the banshee but her wrath and her nagging is enough to make me classify her as one.

I don’t know her personally but she has this reputation at work for being loud, the source of gossip and who knows what else. She was raving mad for the abrupt cancellation of her trip with us, while we were at work we were busy corresponding in outlook about how excited we are of the upcoming trip; mine business theirs purely leisure. I know she’s disappointed and I can’t blame her but the resort owner wouldn’t just cancel them out if not for a valid reason. His cousin called him informing him that tourists just checked in the night before and there’s just one room reserved for us … now this one room is only good for 4 people and thats already an additional bed. Seeing that its gonna be six of us he didnt have any clue where to house them in … so he did what he has to and told them (there’s two of them) that they won’t push through.

As mine is purely of business then of course am part of the crew going there. Vinc e and Jao were also there for business as they need to fix the resort’s pc. Hyd’s even hoped that I wouldnt mind being the only female in the trip, I dont simply because though we’re not close but a relationship even a business one simply bonds trust into it.

A couple more hours and we’d be there … I cannot wait.

While we were at the resort the boys were looking for a thing called fiber cable, I have no clue whats that for but they were working on networking the computers and such. Now as I have no idea what that is and what theyre doing, I took off and seek solace at the beach front … listening to the sound of the waves, thinking, contemplating … damn!

Wednesday shift

It was 4AM when they offered VGH; on my previous post  I mentioned hanging out with Wafa at Mocha Blends were we ate like there’s no tomorrow, so here I am grabbing the images from the other site. I didn’t have my camera at that time so capturing the moment was all up to her.

With my many unpaid vacation leaves on pile I’ve been searching for destinations here and there. Am going to Baguio on the 27th and will be staying at one of the Condo Hotels the place has to offer. Can’t wait to get away and have fun with friends whose gonna meet me there. Would be home by Saturday night and hopefully there’s a boat that would take us to Siargao on Sunday otherwise I cannot go with them.

- So in between taking calls from all three LOBs, I was able to write a post on my calendar of activities. At around 4 AM they offered VGH and since I love VGH (nevermind the deduction on my pay) I raised my hand and was granted what I wanted. Spent a good old bonding moments with Wafa at Mocha Blends where we ate to our hearts content (so much for the diet). Australian Beef Stew and Strawberry Kiwi for me during the first round and Carbonnara and a reddish flavored iced tea for her. We accdg. to her were celebrating Bukie’s birthday, so ironic as the celebrant was not there eating with us. Over food we talked about a bunch of stuff like we normally do which led us to ordering another batch of pasta for the second round. ‘Twas a food trip like the old times and I was full to the brim; it was close to 7AM when I got home and I had to go back to I2 at 9AM to meet up with Roy.

- Was waiting up for Roy at Starbucks to work on our project when I realized that there wasn’t much of me on the entire outcome. True I did have a say on the colors, positioning and on the layout but it was him who did the flash presentation and the coding for the site. Initially when the project was given to me what I wanted was to use an open source cms either joomla or mambo then will just tweak on the template add plug ins and thats it. But with Roy he’s kinda the old fashioned designer would prefer a first hand experience on the coding process. Wants to know which div goes with what so we’re back to good ol dreamweaver, photoshop and flash.

- So he showed me the output and asked what I wanted to be changed; being me I said a lot of things … from the color to the size to the positioning of certain images on the page. He was doing the work while I was busy sipping my hot choco (I finished 2 in a row!!), Mitchy joined us a couple of minutes after and so while Roy was working Mitchy and I were doing chit chat catching up on things. Missed the old times when we both have the same lunch time or when we used to go out just cause we feel like it. But am glad for this day … I get to spend it with her from Starbucks to Robinsons (though the mall is closed) to Gaisano Metro where she helped me pick a swimwear (a first for me … I literally dont swim!!!) and she bought a belt and a nice handbag to Ayala (where to our dismay is close) to SM (which was also close) back to IT Park. Currently hanging out at Cheesecake talking over tuna mayo sandwich and blueberry cheesecake.

- Who knows where we might go next, I still have work tonight but it doesnt matter if I wont get any sleep at least am able to spend quality time with people I missed the most. There are still others whose company I terribly miss but I dont have the guts to tell them how I feel or ask them that we go out sometimes I’ll just wait for fate to let our paths cross at some point so I’ll get to relish their company. I know am a loser on emotions and such a nut case!!

- Back at Starbucks with Mitchy dunno what time I’ll go home later all I know is am enjoying this day and it never occured to me till now how much I miss her company.

I summoned the courage to ask yet another favor from my ever amiable boss (my third boss in succession) to swap my RD from Friday to Saturday. Was not at all pleased when I saw my sched … off friday night work on saturday then leave on Sunday (March 23) to Saturday (April 5). I need to have Saturday night off to go to the resort whose site am working on, though this work is causing me bouts of anxiety and headaches but the thought of visiting the place is an added perk, one that I cannot ignore.

I know you know somebody who knows somebody who needs High Risk Life Insurance. Not sure what that means? If a person’s occupation is considered hazardous like sky diving or let’s say, someone has cancer then those are examples of high risk individuals. It usually is hard for them to find insurance but not impossible. Today there are companies what they can now purchase their policy from.

Roy and I spent almost the whole day at starbucks working on our rough draft due this saturday, I was fresh from work just went home to get my notebook and boom we were there since 9:30 in the morning till 5:30 in the afternoon. Well he left at roughly around 4 PM he still has work at 4:30, because of that project he went on pre shift vgh good thing they allowed him. So from iced white chocolate mocha grande to strawberries and cream plus banana loaf to blueberry cheesecake there I was again awake for more than 24 hours working my brains out.

This is what my mom wanted me to have

Its what am afraid to get myself into

Sure enough I made a disclaimer on a previous post about me regretting writing it which I think I now do but damn it! It was what I felt at the time and it gets stronger by the minute. The change the regression the drawing back they’re all getting stronger. Am not sure where this is leading but for what its worth, am done with school at least for this semester. Was absent from work last night I thought am able to go without sleep but I can’t and the hell with what others think, the only being more concerned about how well my health goes was my mom and now its up to me otherwise I’d be a sitting duck waiting … waiting for my turn.

Am just proud of myself and I think mom would too for having been able to submit all papers and portfolios in time not to brag but not all of us in school were able to do so. Hehehe others stall and would submit their papers next week which if I’ve known I still wouldn’t do. So am free with school work for now and I can look forward to my leaves and LOA and hopefully they’re not retracted.

*sigh*

Ever ran into legal problems where you feel terribly lost in the proceedings of things, unsure of how to even begin? Checked on los angeles probate attorney in the hopes of being able to help a good friend whose living in that area, I never thought there would be so many to choose from. Worst basically have no idea on how to rate them, where to base my decision in choosing which, such a dilemma. If we rely on word of mouth Tanya’s relatives and close friends back there did name a few but in her condition right now of being numb she doesnt even know where to start. Checked on the website and decided that getting a lawyer would make things less complicated for her than it already is. Damn!!! with all the papers you have to prepare not knowing where to get some of them it definitely is a must that she gets a lawyer to help her out. Though were here but we ourselves are ignorant when it comes to the legal proceedings.

Am agitated and am threading on a tight rope right now, its 3:57 AM am still up since yesterday afternoon trying to meet deadlines with my schedule running a bit lose on my side. School was or is fun I actually look forward to another round of pressure this summer but this, the agitation, the more than 24 hours of being awake scenario is getting a hold of me.

So am off Friday night thanks to my understanding TL I get to work on my papers, my portfolio, my reports due tomorrow. Was working on it when it hit me in the head, a reaction I got somewhere sometime ago from someone I never expected it to come from. Told him I’d be having my finals on Saturday whole day and I’ll be working Saturday night too. Uhmmm … all I got was you know there are really no calls on Saturday night … oh ok … I see then I should be great then.

Maybe I was expecting a lot from him, maybe I’ve fallen in places where I shouldn’t be, maybe I was hoping against hope that somewhere somehow things are gonna turn my way. A friend once said maybe I said something that set him off and someone else told me he’s tendency to hold back is gonna hurt me in ways he’ll never know … He was most nice and open and caring when I didn’t know what I want or what I need. Seems like he drew back off when he figured out am not what he thought I was, he has proven what I’ve said from the beginning and though a huge part of me prayed it won’t happen well it has and am at the losing end.

I was hoping he would be around when I needed him most, someone I feel understands me despite the odds but he never was.

Good as it was while it lasted having someone care for you even for a short time, for what it was worth was nice … to open up to someone, speak your mind and just talk on and on; but I wont let someone else get that close ever … I don’t want to be on the losing end again. Am tired of it.

I guess I ought to be thankful for all of these, for what he just said dunno if its just me being super sensitive and maybe he meant well, but as everything happens for a reason that triggered me to open up to the reality that things have changed what used be an apple in his sight must have turned rotten changing things making me accept that it was indeed awfully good to be damn near true. The hell to whoever reads this or how this gets interpreted but this is my way of exorcising my demons within and am positive he’ll drew back even deeper than he already has so maybe I should do the same.

Might regret ever writing this but this is how I feel at the moment, the result of more than 24 hours of being up and about and many more hours to come. Hopefully when Sunday comes so does rest and peace … for my heart and for my soul.

When I was a kid I used to think highly of cowboys and the wild wild west, of texas and of rodeos. They’ve gotten me so fascinated every time I watch them in movies, now that I’ve grown older I realized they weren’t for me but I couldn’t help but appreciate little kids in childrens cowboy boots, their parents must be a huge fan of the cowboys as well.

With the advancement of technology, a lot of devices have been created to cater to the growing needs of the population. Say for instance computers which have grown tremendously popular not only with businesses but even in every typical home. Same thing goes with medicine, there’s a huge improvement on the machinery they use in treating patients, in discovering and creating new drugs for diseases that were thought of as incurable in the past. Lets take a look at opthalmology, with time eye problems such as myopia, hyperopia and astigmatism has increased its effect on the population. Here’s where technology play its vital part with a certain type of refractive laser eye surgery performed by skilled ophthalmologists could now correct the eye problems which were deemed impossible to cure way back then. For those suffering from myopia, hyperopia and astigmatism you might wanna consult your ophthalmologists for solutions to your problems. Am sure they’d suggest that you go through the refractive laser eye surgery but if you’re not decided yet better check out the net on Lasik Information, am sure there’s plenty to read so that you’ll have a background of how it works. Check out what other patients have to say and weigh them down before you decide on should you or should you not pursue.

The doctor and the nurse at the clinic sent me home, I was still puking my guts out on the floor and though my seatmate could not really see what it was that I excreted but the sound was already gross in itself that it made her wanna skip on lunch. So off I went to the clinic and was advised to go home, the doctor said this is not just about the ulcer/hyperacidity anymore but it has something to do with my eyes too. Eye strain and error of refraction were amongst the things she mentioned but in laymans term the way I understand is I need to rest my eyes and that meant no TV for one week and computers.

Now this neighbor of ours has this big male Labrador on standby at their doorstep, every time I pay a visit to their home I get apprehensive seeing him. Though he recognizes me as we’re old neighbors, he even wag his tale every so often when I approach but still his size is enough to scare me a teeny weeny bit. Now a dog as huge as him eats a lot and you know what follows right? We’ll his owners were from the states and you know how advance things are in the states and how they love their pets that much they got him UGODOG. ” UGODOG is an innovative and environmentally friendly indoor dog potty and house training system. UGODOG indoor dog potty will not only keep your dog’s paws dry, but will keep your house dry, just the way you and your pet prefer it. UGODOG indoor dog potty provides all of the benefits of a dog litter box Thats the description I got from the website after searching for it, I was pretty impressed with it … it sure keeps mess away to the comfort of both the pet and their owners. So if you have a pet even though not as big as Bernard (thats his name by the way)I strongly suggest you get one of these Ugodog both for convenience and comfort for your beloved pet.

My notebook was infested with a multitude of spyware and adware so since am not blessed enough to understand how to make them go away the only solution I could think of was have it reformatted which was basically what I did yesterday. Went to the store where this was purchased and asked one of the tech guys to reformat it for me, he didn’t even asked for my receipt the moment he saw me he just took my bag and asked whats wrong. Ain’t that sweet?

Lovely and I were in this together and since I was sick last three days (don’t think I am now) its time to celebrate for health, youth and life (though the last one sucks at the moment). We headed out to Cafe Georg were a friend is working and though the quacks told me I can only eat cereals for the next two weeks, I’ll be damned!!!! I had my fill of the their chicken lemongrass, banana oreo and oreo cheesecake.

After draining my battery, we decided to watch 10,000 BC (can’t say I like the movie though) despite the fact that I got papers due next Saturday and so many pending online assignments. *sigh* Well I had fun, that was way out of the ordinary and though she’s s’pose to be studying for the licensure examinations she didn’t mind either.  We’re out we had fun and I just made up my mind on getting a new notebook, 12.1 inches this time … 14.1 is just not for me.

I’ve been thinking about getting a franchise for one of the juice companies in the country problem is I don’t have enough budget to pull it off. It would have been nice to think of business aside from work and school all the time. Was thinking of collaborating with two other friends who liked the idea at first, I mean we’ve discussed it but I just don’t think they were serious enough to actually wanna do it.

My team lead insisted that I be accompanied to the hospital it was the nurse’s suggestion to me in the first place seeing that I was dehydrated. I said no all I wanna do it curl up in bed and sleep to oblivion, but as my team lead requested for her to accompany me thats when off we went to the ER. Now I was stuck in a cab with two people (the nurse and her colleague of some sort) whisking us away to the hospital, tears of pity fell down my face, I hate hospitals all the more I hate the fact the people accompanying me doesnt know me at all nor do they care. They were there not because they want to but because they have to, it was part of their job. That came second … second ill-feeling experience I’ve had … second to seeing mom die. While we were in the ER waiting for the doctor, the wait was exhausting if only they let me go home I would have been asleep by then.

I was bombarded with a series of questions and as has been the case with these check-ups am in for a battery of lab tests. I asked the doctor if I can possibly just go home and have all the tests done tomorrow. She said its okay for me to stay and sleep there while waiting for the results. Like duh!!! How can someone ever sleep amongst faceless crowd? I persisted and said I wanna go home. And so since persistence is the key they asked me to sign a waiver … washing their hands clean like Pontius Pilate … but am not dying yet, so I signed the waiver but the doctor said to have at least have a blood sample taken. Alright.

As have been the case with my blood taken it’d take 2 to 3 times of trial and error before they can get sufficient amount for testing. Something wrong with my veins, this time what the nurse or whatever said that my veins collapsed so we have to redo it. Right … so from left to right then back to the left … sigh.

When that was done I finally went home. Its morning now and am s’pose to go back there to finish off the lab test but truth be told all I wanna do right now is just go back to sleep … sleep … sleep and never wake up.

I’v been meaning to get real thin but it has not come to a point yet that am considering taking slimming pills. Right now though with my current ulcer and the fact that I have so many food restrictions dieting is the last thing on my mind. But I do have a friend who’s into it as well and since I came across a herbal diet pill online called hoodia I might mention this to her so she can get to check out the site and possibly try it and see it it works.

When I arrived at work I was dead on my feet went to the clinic and since it was a different nurse on duty she looked up my file as I told her what my situation is. I was also at the clinic the other night coz of constant vomiting, I was just on my station pulling up my tools when out of nowhere this urge to puke hits full blast. Moved the waste bin next to me and puked every now and then, my tl seeing me in that condition advised me to go to the clinic and there the nurse gave me something to drink which I puked after a few seconds.

She gave me a tablet to take which I puked just the same after a few minutes, I grew beat with all the vomitting I’ve done, she asked me to wait for the doctor so that the doctor can prescribed me something. While waiting I befriended another sick agent, she lost her voice and has difficulty breathing, she was also asked to wait for the doctor. ‘Twas 10PM, the nurse said the doctor is due to arrive 11:30 PM, meantime as we were hungry we went down … out of the building as the food in the pantry sucks.

What little I ate (the nurse said I can only eat soup and noodles) I puked when we went back to the clinic. When the doctor arrived she prescribed something and explained to me what I can eat and what food to avoid. Definitely no more coffee for me and thats devastating. Coffee is literally my lifeblood!!!

I was advised to go home which was a relief as I can’t picture myself taking calls with the waste bin next to me.

We went out, I mean my wave as two of us are resigning (Frances and Kim) so to advance our 2nd year anniversary we had dinner at Royal Concourse and then videoke session at Star Club and finished it off at the Pump.

~ Pioneer Team Keith ~

~ From left to right: Aisah; Ching Ching; Jen; Moi ~

~ Photo Shoot (char!!!) courtesy of Eds;

and the models : Majin (Jake’s girlfriend); Jen; and Yours Truly ~

~ ladies in black ~

~ sexy back (?!!) ~

~ that’s s’pose to be candid ~

~ now this one is truly candid ~

~ blogistas on the lose ~

~ us again ~

~ moi ~

~ jen, moi and ching ching ~

~ moi and ching ching ~

~ gals ~

~ commander, moi and cuddly bear ~