My Pink Shoelace

Hurt – beyond words, beyond reason and logic. Why did I fall for someone whom I know would never catch me? And why do I keep this wishful thinking and keep on getting hurt when I knew time and again that this would just be the case?

Does he abhor my company so much that he can’t find the words to say no to my simple invitation? I messaged him about something which he replied to but when I asked if he’s coming or not he didn’t reply. I stood rooted to the ground, debating whether to wait or to just call it quits. A part of me knew he’d never come but still there’s that silly voice inside my head that keeps on hoping he would.

Much to my dismay not only didn’t he show up he didn’t even send a message, so I stood there looking at schedules without really seeing for an hour … tears clouding my eyes. An hour … hoping for a simple message, I would have taken it at face value if he’d said no, that would have not been so bad. But to stay silent and leave me wondering … was downright painful.

I should have seen this coming, am not the kind of person who insist my company onto those who disdain it and that’s one painful lesson learned.

I haven’t cried this much since mom died and all the while I thought am immune to tears apparently his attitude and his insensitivity hurt more than I gave it credit for.

With the coming season, the team is already planning for the upcoming Christmas Party and the corresponding exchanging of gifts. It is going to be Manito-Manita, Cholee is going to collect our individual wish lists for possible gift ideas soon and am already contemplating on the items am going to include on my list. Being a nerd and a music addict probable choice for me would be books and a music player. An ipod make a great gift but that’s way beyond our agreed amount. Ever since I saw Kitoy’s iPod nano, I think that was the classic one I’ve been meaning to buy my own but I want something more feminine and with much bigger capacity. So when iPod touch was released I readily surf the web and went to a local iStore shop here. A friend suggested that in order to save time and for convenience sake it’d be better to go online to a price comparison site, check on the various models, colors and prices of each units before heading to the store and buying one.

Well Yayen’s coming home next week and she just confirmed that she just bought the 32 gig iPod touch for me, the pink iPod nano is kinda enticing imagine having 2 ipods lol but am sticking with the latest  so I’d take that off my wish list and just include huggables, books from Haruki Murakami (except of course those that I have already) and books from Jennifer Weiner. I so so wanna clamor to read The Guy Not Taken, think I’ll grab a copy so I’ll have something to read on the plane. *winks*

It was an impromptu decision we went half day, went to the bank and deposited some money, went back to the office and woke Mitchy up in the lounge. We went to Ayala, ate a bunch of chicken from KFC’s bucket meal and watched Twilight. Diva and Mitchy are not that familiar with the book or with the movie for that matter. But I’ve convinced them to watch the movie wth me, we bumped into a couple of other friends from work.

The Movie

I guess it was not what I expected or maybe am expecting much. Its the same feeling right after I watched Prisoner of Azkaban. I think it goes for all novels turned to movies, there are quite a few scenes from the book that are deleted from the movie. Though I find Robert Pattinson just fit for the role but I find Bella stiff, lol am not much of a movie critique but thats how I see her.

All in all I like the movie and the “kilig” factor it brought … giggles escaped the crowd from time to time and I can’t help but wish I’ll find my own Edward soon. Lol

Mitchy, practical as always, would not get me a pink skateboard for my birthday she said she’ll get me a book instead. Being a nerd I do love reading and asked her to get me any book by Haruki Murakami, last Tuesday we went to Ayala to buy a present for me and to National Bookstore to buy my book. So there goes the element of Surprise.

We had dinner last night at Moon Cafe, that’d include Moi, Mik, A, Mitchy, Mik’s cousin and his girlfriend and Mik’s sister. A and Bukie got me a book as well, which was what I asked from them and still from the same author. They got me Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World. Mik said he’ll buy me the pink piglet we saw at Toy Kingdom months ago but am beginning to change my mind. A book from Haruki would be nicer … I’ll text him tonight and ask him to buy me Norwegian Wood instead.

Apart from reading online comics James has gotten fascinated with USA Online gambling. I asked him why limit just within the US when you can play in any casino rooms all over the world, anyways its online. He said well for beginners its advisable and practical to start with USA Online Casinos, though the market is big but your in your home base.

There are times that I feel so stressed out and I lost track of all the things I have, the office supplies that I keep would sometimes diminish because I fail to list them down and replenish my supplies. *sigh* Right now, one of the things I now remember buying would be a couple of color pens the ones that glitter and a ream of short bond papers. Who knows I might wanna continue working on my scrapbooks, or my personalized photo frames.

I’ll think about them when I get home, but first things first … stocking up. Time to visit the bookstore.

November 22, 2008 : Dinner @ Kagura

- I told them I wanna celebrate my birthday with them so it was decided that since I am not available Sunday night we’ll celebrate it on Saturday night. Lovely had a class that ended at 6PM while mine ended at 3PM, it gave me an ample time to visit Mom. RJ texted and said to meet up at BTC at 7PM, hehe now I picked Lovely up at her school at around 6:45PM and dragged her to SM where we searched for that baby I want (that’s a separate entry). We arrived at BTC at around 8PM, RJ has been texting us all these time asking where we were hahaha.

We arrived and she took us to Kagura, its a Japanese restaurant, if there’s one thing that hasn’t change … that’s her love for everything Japanese.  ‘Twas a first for Lovely and Moi to dine in a Japanese restaurant and it was a blast, I was terribly full. Here are some snapshots:

- rj, rose, moi -

- examining the croakay (am not sure if i spell that right) -

- 3R’s -

- on the way home -

- Welcome to Kagura -

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

The coming holiday season entails various parties meaning loads and loads of food and though I got back to going to gym again after a week or so of hiatus am not sure if it’ll work in my favor after I ate my fill of the holiday’s goodies. I’ve had a few vain people in my circle of friends and one has already mentioned buying a bottle of Leptorexin, according to her this diet pill has been proven and tested to be effective (aren’t they all?). We’ll see.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Should have seen this coming but still I had my hopes up. Now it came crashing down. No Sumilon. No Malaysia and possibly No Davao. Second priority remember? Now what’ll happen to those tickets we purchased???? Sheeeeyyyyt!!! I know .. ah hate it but what can I do? Am just a commoneeeeer.

My birthday seem to have fallen on the account’s 3rd year anniversary and what right do I have to enforce my close friends to spend the day with me at Sumilon when the accounts holding a bash that’s free and for everybody?

*sigh* my first without her and damn its all so wrong.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Saw this $ 8 Complete Rx Eyeglasses from the popular online eyeglasses shop while I was doing my bloghopping rounds. Well this Holiday Glass Frames From Zenni Optical is a sure hit this season and I can’t wait to get a pair for myself. My own eyeglasses needed replacement, the lens have scratches on them and the frame is kinda lose. Oh well what’d you expect it’s been with me for close to two years now.

In this day and age, advertisement has evolved from the regular brochures and post its to digital signage we’d see on the streets. Those humongous billboards we see everywhere also called adfotainment has improved the marketing strategies of companies advertising their services and needs. Though many still use brochures and leaflets especially those starting out and small time businesses but if you wanna cater to a bigger audience then these billboards are whats right for you.

The fourth book in the Twilight series by Stephenie Meyer. Yep, I bought a copy earlier when I went to National Bookstore to buy a scientific calculator for my Statistics class. Was it planned? lol … am the impulsive type and though I’ve been meaning to buy the series (though I’ve read the 3 books already) for collection purposes, I started with the fouth one. Weeeee its still in its plastic, didnt dare touch it otherwise I know I won’t stop till am done reading and that’d jeopardize work and school. Would read it during my rest day. Can’t wait for the movie to be released here.

Also bought Mitchy the book she asked for … those type of books read by “government officials” lol … peace out Mitchy 

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

A friend of mine have always wanted to get a ntoebook but she won’t settle for anything ordinary. lol What she wants is either a macbook just like mine or a Sony Vaio, given these choices she’d have to spend at least 70 to 80K and if am not mistaken that’s something she doesn’t have yet. So she’s kinda contemplating on interest only personal loan offered first by her friend working in a financial institution and second by various online companies. According these type of loans wouldn’t be so bad because unsecured personal loan online is an installment loan so its easy to pay off. So nowshe’s thinking of which one to file for the offered by her friend wherein she has to visit the office of the lending firm and go through all the hassle of lining and stuff or go unsecured personal loan online wherein the papers can be filed out for at home. *sigh* I dunno which one to choose either if it were me.

Albeit, this is way off the bandwagon already … but am catching on thanks to the ebooks a colleague of mine sent over at work. Am hopelessly falling deeper than ever with the Twilight series … I know I know this is way obsolete but better late than never right? The last series I got hooked on was Harry Potter, followed by the Shopaholic and now whew … am falling in love with Edward!!!

Listened to the soundtrack of the upcoming movie and I am very much enchanted with Bella’s lullabye, the music is just so perfect … no wonder Bella fell in love with it. *sigh* such a hopeless romantic.

The book “Twilight” is no longer available in any of the bookstores here, I should have bought one when it was first out … oh well … Yayen’s coming home for the holidays and she’s bringing me one. Yey!!! I’ve read it already but just like the HP series … am adding it to my personal library.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

A friend of mine working in an insurance firm has been offering me various health insurance quote for quite some time now, and though she only means well looking out for my future and all but a call every other day and a text message on a daily basis is kinda annoying. I dont know how to break the news to her that am still not ready but at some point I gotta do it either wise I’ll go bananas. Some colleagues are work are working out various plans on their own, am just not sure on when I’ll start thinking or applying one for my own.

What she gets every pay day is like half of what I get every pay day and I was like … ok.

She asked, are you sure about what you’re planning? I was like, uhmmm yeah … maybe. So the typical response from a typical me and I did say am going back to my roots pretty soon, am already working on the first half of my plan. If this goes well … all I’d need is a backup savings to see me through the coming months.

Pay would always be small for starters so am working on a different savings account dedicated to back me up. I wish all the people at work who owe me monies would pay me back before the year ends so I can move forward with my plans.

I know monies would always be an issue and I know these people are having issues financially as well but its my right to retrieve them back. *sigh*

I guess I shouldn’t have shelled out those monies in the first place … when Charlotte (from Sex and the City) said friends and monies don’t go together, am beginning to think she’s right.

Oh well … whats done is done. I’ll work on collecting those monies back and never ever shell out any again. Ever.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Doi and I watched Madagascar 2: Escape to Africa last night and prior to that we had dinner at Lai Garden, the serving was good for two people and when we were done I was bloated. Ever since I hang out with Doi every once and I awhile, I’ve noticed that we both love good food and are both worried about getting obese. I used to weigh a hundred and seven pounds but now … ahhh don’t ask. Lets just say I’ve gained weight and like Doi is seriously contemplating on taking those heavily advertised diet pill. I’ve read so many reviews already I can no longer recall which one was what, but the latest review I’d read is about alli diet pill which is similar accdg. to the review to Xenical. Am not sure if this pill is available in the local market but if it is then maybe just maybe its worth a try. *winks*

Arghh… not only am I not able to buy a new flash memory card for my digital camera I was also not able to buy a backup battery for it. *sigh* My pink digital camera which is two years old (I know, time to replace it) is still functioning but there’s a slight problem to the battery. It doesn’t last long like it used to, used to work for at least 5 to 6 hours of constant usage but now it’d only stay on for an hour or so. Huhuhuhu … should I buy a new battery and a new memory card or should I go ahead and buy a new one? What chu think?

I’ve never been much of a car lover but seeing a picture of the Mercedes-Benz BlueTEC during my bloghopping rounds got my interest piqued. I know nothing much about cars, RJ has one and is very much updated on the latest on rides and all. Lovely is planning on getting one for her and her family and back then I didn’t feel the need or should I say the want. Was contented on taking a cab to work and jeepneys in between, though having a car certainly has its perks but looking closely I kinda think there are more downsides than advantages. For one, I keep remembering how Jade used to complain about the monthly maintenance, and how Doi said the charge for parking at office basement is much higher compared to the cab fare. Yikes!!! So that being said am not so sure if getting a car is a necessity, but seeing this ride … am seriously considering. lol … not that I can afford it anytime soon but you know … wishful thinking. Used to love the Vios but seeing this darling I readily made the switch … so much for undying loyalty.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Cute notebooks!!! yep am crazy about them … and I’ve asked almost all of my close friends at work for one. Hehehe … Am still in school, there seems to be no ending to this schooling of mine so I made that an excuse and asked for notebooks from anyone I could think of. Weeeee I’ve gathered two so far and I still have two people … whom I wont stop bugging till I get one from each. Waaaa.

A friend of mine wanted to setup a site for their family’s craft business, she called up two days ago asking my opinion about which web hosting company to go. I didn’t want to monopolize and just ask her to go with the hosting company I have for my blog. So I told her that if you want to know the many hosting companies out there then it’d be better if you read web hosting reviews from various sites and web hosting blog before signing for one.

Features, availability of tech support, rate per month should be amongst the things to consider when looking for a hosting provider. How good would it be if they offer you much space and bandwidth for a lesser price compared to the others but then you cannot get hold of their technical support when you need help on something?

Am not sure what progress what progress she has made by now, but from my guess she seemed very enthusiastic about working on their family’s business and would wanna extend it online, she still has to think though of a domain name for the site, on the layout and likes but I think that will have to come much later after the purchase of a good web hosting package. If in need of good and bad reviews, you dont really have to remember a specific site, searching for it in google using key words or phrases like top ten web hosting would produce quite a lot of results, I’d usually skim through the first ten web sites that’d come out. Somehow these sites would produce more or less the same names of hosting companies though not exactly in the same order.

When I went to Bangkok, one of the places I wanna visit was the Sea World, but given the cost well it was beyond our budget. Now the picture I ran across online reminded me of that show in Sentosa (Singapore) with the pink dolphins. Though I’d like to go away somewhere again but I don’t see that as plausible as of the moment. Apparently am still sort of second choice when VL application is concerned so for now all I can do is relish the stories from friends about their recent escapades. *sigh* If there’s anything I want now that’d be to avail of any of the Orlando vacations offered on one of the sites I ran into. Imagine Disney and Sea World in one? Tempting.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

For my masters degree, I still have 4 subjects (12 units) remaining before I can take the comprehensive exam, the result of which would determine if I can proceed in writing my technical paper alongside taking the Intensive Practicum. Getting my technical paper approved and passing the Intensive Practicum would earn me my masters degree in Special Education major in Hearing Impairment. Unfortunately students are allowed to take only 9 units every semester, but with the dean’s approval a student can carry 12 units (an overload) provided that the student is a full time student or a scholar lol and damn it am neither. Though I strongly feel that managing my time should not be any of their business but I respect the school’s decision. Given the odds, even if I finish the 12 units by March, take the comprehensive exam by summer and lets say I pass it and they’d grant me enrollment on the Intensive Practicum and Technical Writing by June of 2009, I’d still graduate by March 2009 as they don’t hold commencement exercises on October.

My course of action given the changes am facing, is to take the 9 units this second semester, enroll the other 3 units by June, take the comprehensive exam by October 2009, and hopefully with God’s grace, enroll on the Intensive Practicuum and Technical Writing by November and finish by March 2009.

Still a long shot but better that than having none to follow at all.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

A support engineer called in and requested for a new ticket to be opened for the customer. He also told me that we’re gonna join a bridge call and theres gonna be a lot of people on that call. Whew!! So I said okies, now when he said a lot of people what I had in mind was 4 or 5 people but what were on the line were like 7 or 8 people. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa and I can no longer distinguish which voice belongs to the customer. lol

Pinged the tech and he was laughing when I asked for his help. lol .. it was not part of our training to join bridge calls so that was a first … yikes!! I said on that bridge call hearing different voices with different accents for 25 minutes (the tech said he’s been at it for 7 hours and counting) only to have the customer tell me that they’d postpone the case creation for now and will do some testing first.

Good luck to my aht!!!!

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Ever thought of a career as a private investigator? Or maybe a crime detective? Like James Bond or those cool guys and gals in CSI? Well I once dreamed of becoming one when I was like 8, guns seem to fascinate me and the way a single bullet could kill an individual instantly is overwhelming. I was awed by the sheer power of having the capability to kick some ass and to be able to defend myself against bad folks. The mind of an 8 year old, but things have changed and though I still fancy the idea of becoming someone as stealthy as the character played by Angelina in Wanted, am more realistic and sensible now. Still manage to squeeze in a bit of time to read private investigator articles which as always never failed to intrigue and amuse me. The stealth, intellect and the cunning ways of these investigators never failed to pique my interest. I guess its beneficial if in our own way as common citizens we learn the basics crime prevention and should always be on the look out for possible crime outburst.

In the course of my bloghopping throughout the mighty blogospher I’ve come to land on some really informative private investigator blogs. One of the sites I’ve recently included in my bookmarks is the PI Magazine, one stop source of journal of professional articles related to crime and the tasks of the various investigators. Interested in crime busting? Then better check them out.

My boss promised me yesterday that we’ll do coaching the following day at the start of my shift. I was looking forward to it actually as I have some clarifications on process and what not.

It scared me to know that one of my team mate was placed on corrective action plan and that I might be heading down that path soon. Never fully understood what’s in it for me, bec the first and the last time I was placed on such action plan they still moved me to this LOB am currently in. If you ask me it somehow lost whatever merit it holds. A friend also said what’d you get if you’ve got good score cards anyway? It’s not like you’re applying for a higher position … yeah yeah yeah … all true but an agent’s gotta have some sort of motivation to keep coming back right?

So we had our coaching and he was surprised on how I state things, the way I understood them. Clarifications were done … I asked him to give me a week to work on something.

I did feel a twinge bad … just a teeny weeny twinge … when I asked my boss if I was one of his outliers during their skip level. Imagine … having been discussed by whoever was there why this agent is not hitting the metrics and all. What a shame?!!!!! Oh well thats their job anyway … yikes!

Am not aspiring to reach number 1 … lol … thats for other folks hehe lets just say am done racing for the top … I’ve had my share academically so am done and out. lol

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

A week or so ago, it was a Saturday, I bought a new notebook. Yeah, I did not on an impulse but well I dunno how you qualify it but I bought one, its pink, 12 inches and loaded with Vista Home Premium. Its a pink Neo Vivid 2121 …

Now this baby didn’t last long in my hands for the following reasons:

*** No matter how many times I tried installing VStudio Developer 2005 and 2008 from the MS site, it would download the files but won’t complete the install, it’d give out setup.exe has stopped working error and would quit. So much for grand plans of self studying … lol.

*** I’ve grown so used to the size of my macbook’s keyboard that the teeny weeny blocks for each keys on that Neo was annoying. I mistyped every so often.

*** Am not sure if its a problem with the OS or with the hardware, but that darn thing would freeze every so often even though the tech already changed the upgraded memory. That notebook is already running on Intel Core 2 Duo, w/ 3gig ram and 160 HDD, am not sure what its problem was, good thing it comes with one year warranty on parts and lifetime warranty on service or shall I say labor.

I gave it up, right before I purchased it I pinged Diva and told him of my plan and that if its comes to a point where I won’t like it (so much for prediction!!) he’ll buy it. Well not really buy it as in hand me the cash then and there but more like installment. I guess that’s better than being stuck with something I won’t like. lol

When Logan heard about it he asked me earlier, what the hell is wrong with you?.  I said, did it not occur to you that I still havent figured out what I want? lol

He also asked if my other notebook’s paid in full already, I said nope but my birthday is yet to come. So yeah, a lot of notebook’s have come and passed my hands so far this macbook has stayed the longest and hopefully this would be for keeps. Am crossing my fingers.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

- rj, rose, moi @ joe’s chicken inato -

- rj’s driving, on our way to ayala to watch a movie -

- @ joe’s chicken inato waiting for our food to be served -

Never once thought we’d reach this far, lol, from elementary all the way to early adulthood and hopefully till we grow old. This was last Thursday (during my rest day hehehe).

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Got this award from Pink Mama … whew!!! Thanks much … will be passing this on to the beautiful people of my blogroll. So do grab it. To get the code, click here.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!