My Pink Shoelace

As you already know, I have left the “typical call center” industry. I left my first work of four years and I am now working full time as a freelancer. A friend once asked, what I do now for a living and I responded that I am an all around freelance geek. This is something I have considered since 2008, right about when mom died. It took me two years to finally gather the guts to let go of my comfort zone and tender an immediate resignation. I miss my friends and the pay but I most certainly do not miss the ever increasing workload.

So to give you an update, I am now working as a full time virtual assistant. 8 hours a day, 5 days a week a total of 40 hours per week. My client is based in the US and is a quite agreeable fellow, I get to choose my own hours.
I won’t disclose the pay [hahaha], it is not as big as I am used to but boy I love it. Stress free! I mean literally, I get to divide my screen into two. The media player on the left side showing whatever anime I am watching and on the right, the excel spreadsheet or my browser working on a project.

My aunt asked me how I am, and I told her I love my new found work but I miss my old pay. She said life is all about choices. High pay + stress or regular pay + less stress. I chose the latter and she’s quite glad with my choice. Besides as she plainly put it … you don’t have to worry about your pay, you got your allowance from me anyway.

So that’s life for me now … full time freelance, working on my masters, my mandarin class and joining all travel escapades with friends from work and oh not to mention …. learning the arts of raqs sharqi.

Ssssshhhh … no laughing on the last part. I am dead serious!!!! *wink wink*

I said goodbye to my second family earlier today. I handed my resignation letter effective immediately and I am just glad that the big boss accepted it … otherwise my four years tenure would go down the drain. People were surprised, they knew that at some point I would leave they just didn’t expect it to be so soon.

I filed a leave for the first two weeks of June last April and there no feedback whatsoever and no response to the follow up I made, I only knew last Wednesday that it was disapproved because of staffing issues.  For personal reasons I have to be overseas for these dates and I chose to leave … what I didn’t expect was it to hurt the way it did and I cried, cried like I did when mom died. Anj told me not to cry much, she said it’s not a loss but an opportunity for me to venture out on something new.

I guess I wasn’t ready emotionally to let go of the people I have come to love … it sucks and a part of me is afraid that with the separation I made with the company comes the separation of the friendship I have with so many people. I have become rather clingy ever since mom left after all friends are all I have right now and I hate the thought of losing them.

Before I went to the office to tender my resignation I made a promise to myself that I won’t cry … my friends would always be around no matter where I work and we’re just one text away from each other.  But that changed when I said goodbye to dodong and cried, I cried when I talked to Te Kate yesterday and I’m just glad I didn’t see Mitchy on the floor earlier otherwise it would have been too difficult to stop the tears from coming.

Weng, you are such a crybaby! I mentally scolded myself over and over … but you my dear reader must understand, this is my first job, a job I held for four years and leaving all these people behind was harder than I could ever possibly imagine. We said we’d keep in touch and am holding that thought close to my heart; my comfort words.

**Sayonara – It Has Been Sweet‏**

I suck at saying Goodbyes … so I’d do it in writing.

It has been an amazing four years with you guys, I’ve found my second family here and it’s painful for me to leave but the circumstances forced me to choose … I’m at the point where no matter how I want to compromise I can’t seem to have both.

I cannot begin to describe how thankful I am to have met all of you … so I guess this it …  and I’ll see you guys around.

 —-

 Weng

————– end of chapter 1

————– looking forward to starting chapter 2

I haven’t been this sickly before and I realized that all this started happening when I began working in a call center. I mean true my asthma began when I was like 4 mos. old but it hasn’t been that severe back then but now it has gone to way abnormal. Since I started I’ve been to countless of doctors, allergologist, eent’s, internal medicine doctors and a whole bunch of others all telling me that if I don’t stop what am doing now I’d prolly end up with hearing aids by the time am 30.

So today I am absent again due to swollen tonsils, it’s very difficult for me to speak as well as swallow even my own saliva. Huhuhuhu, I called the office and spoke with our OM himself and explained my problem he accepted my explanation and reminded me to make sure I bring a medcert.

I am going to miss yet another team building because of my schedule. You see they always schedule team buildings on a Sunday and a Monday; this would be the first team building for our team and it’d be on the 18th and 19th but I cannot go because I have work and the vacation leave that I filed for [unpaid I might add] was not approved and for the life of me I cannot understand why it’s not approved.

What I was told was that the scheduler does not approve it and there’s nothing we can do … now that “reason” is not good enough, wanna know why? I have seen them place and remove schedules manually … so telling me it cannot be done is bullshit, they have to do better than that. Now you might say why not swap rest days so I can go.

I am currently working my 7th day in a row because of a swap and I gotta tell you I will not do it again ever. Joining the team building is enticing but if its at the expense of working 10 days straight then forget it; what ticks me off is that my team lead approved those dates that I filed for already but  the scheduler [may God rest his soul] rejected it.

Telling me I cannot go on leave because we are understaffed doesn’t make any sense, it’s not my fault we are understaffed, it’s not my fault people are leaving the account. I have seen them put a schedule when there’s none and remove it for these swaps am in right now … I cannot figure out why they disapproved what my team lead already approved of.

Now I am ranting here because I cannot tell them straight to their faces what I think … why? because I’d bet my soul on it that I’d hear the infamous line … “If you’re not happy with the way things are then leave”. Sad but true am not yet ready to leave … so here I am coming to work every day growing bitter and bitter by the minute.

They might have their reasons management wise but I as a minority  don’t get it … nor do I give a shit. I’m not asking to go on leave with pay … it’s without pay … let me reiterate without pay. Cripes!

Well … my friend said, Weng … you chose to stay so suck it up! So here I am ranting … thank you very much for reading and you have a nice day!

I am going to take the exam this March [first week of March] and I cannot live with myself if I fail. Sheyt! I am book smart and it’d be a major disgrace if I don’t ace this; problem is I have been on hiatus from school for close to a year … so I’d have to cram 2 years worth of lessons into my cro-magnon skull. Grrrrr …

So safe to say I am scared shitless and I am hoping the vl I filed for a week gets approved otherwise you know what  would be EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY!

*sigh* Lets just say in the course of the last 6 months I’ve grown to develop a certain pet peeve … for people who asks the dumbest of questions. God, can someone just kill me?!! I hate it when smart people [or so I used to think of them] would ask me stupid questions. What’s wrong with you people??

Okay, so I know of some really good people who turned bad and then just plain stupid in less than 1 minute. Gosh, and here I thought he was this high and mighty someone you look up to … but in a split second he became 10 centimeters tall in my eyes.

When someone is sick, common sense would tell you to say “Get Well Soon” right? I mean if you are in the normal state of mind that what you’re suppose to say to show you care and you wish that person well but no …. this apparently has been thrown of the window and instead I was told … just make sure you have proper documentation when you get back. Isn’t that standard procedure already? … Instead of feeling at ease I felt downright threatened by the tone of his voice … seems to me, he’s just about ready to throw me out. Oh well … I sure will bring my documentation amongst other things.

and there might just be a third … lol. Okay so I filed for leave [unpaid! as always] on the 23rd and the 24th and on the 29th all the way to the 5th of December. Doi was right if I cannot find someone to accompany me on my “laags” then I’ll go on my own … what are these feet for??? nyahahaha.

But really am crossing my fingers that all of ‘em would get approved … work has been work … and there are several faces I prefer not to see and bump into the halls but as Bena said, we gotta endure, I gotta endure for the fulfillment of my plans.

So Weng, quit being stingy! yikes!

For the first time in 3 years I was actually smiling at something work related.  As you might already know I am under new management, female management this time and I have made a promise to myself that should I be transferred to her team [I did beg her to take me] that I would give her a shot. I have always been partial with female team leads but this time I vow to give it a positive outlook. I was taking calls earlier when the goodies above were distributed … since my team lead was around she convinced the OM and SOM to start distributing these goodies to the agents and our team was the first to get ‘em. Whopppeeee!!!

This is a first for Microsoft and I must say this surely made all of the agents happy … when Windows Vista was released we were hoping we’d be given promotional kits but given that the OS in itself is very very expensive it became just a dream … when Windows 7 was still in the making … some of us did wish to be given a copy but given my experience with the Vista launching, I didn’t think so.

The tech support for Windows 7 did get these goodies first and I thought it was rather fitting for them to be given one but as for us “human switchboards” it was too fancy to be true. Microsoft has been very generous this time and provided everybody our very own copy of a full version copy of Windows 7 Ultimate! not Home Premium but Ultimate … whooooohooooo.

Everybody’s happy and I guess this was the morale booster … everybody has been looking for. They’ve really outdone themselves this time … sure the blankets, mugs, bags and shirts were okay but they were well pretty generic but this … definitely exceeds expectations!

Will they give us promotional kits when Office 2010 gets released???? Crossing my fingers …. lol

Hahaha that’s what I’d like to think of my situation now lol. The doctor’s recommendation was that I be admitted but I don’t want to so she said the next best thing is to have me stay at home and rest so HOUSE ARREST bwahahahah.

I will have a new team lead starting next week, an obsessive compulsive female who normally would have cause my insides to go upside down but given the several choices of the available team leads on the floor she’s okay. I mean she was my friend first before she becomes my team lead and we’ll see how this goes otherwise there’s always the option to leave. My resignation letter is just one print away; and oh they bloody issued an NTE for me … for not calling in when I was absent for a day.

When you’re breathing is not as normal like most people and the air around you seems to run out calling the office is the least of your worries but then management is always management and being the lowly agent that I am all I can do is bow down and curse all of ‘em under my breath.

He said its most likely disapproved and I was like what??!! It’s the whole world came crashing down. And I know that many people frown at the sound of my name and words vacation leave put together but the hell with them. This time am not going anywhere not out of the country not even outside of the city. Was gonna use those days to study and yes study I mean literally cram my brains out for the upcoming comprehensive examinations for my master’s degree.

Am not sure what’ll happen, I texted her already and to be honest am not even sure what I want her to say … you know … all I know is everything is just f^^k!ng floating at the moment.

I’ve probably written this a hundred of times and am writing it again. I hate my work. I hate waking up every 12 midnight to get ready for work. I hate standing outside the street waiting for a cab at one in the morning. I hate having to answer all those calls with sarcastic people on the other end of the line. I hate having to work out on those metrics and I hate having to follow the rules. But then in this society we’re in civilized people follow rules … otherwise you’re out.

Gosh! So much hate on there now isn’t it. I know you’d prolly say, “Stop yapping and quit”. I know I’ve told myself as much but right now am trying to persevere in the fulfillment of my plans so I’ll just rant it all out here. I certainly can’t tell my boss I hate doing what am doing now can I? lol

But it’s official, I don’t like being a human switchboard, and when all things fall into their respective places then I’ll hand in my resignation without hesitation.

Breathe … breathe … breathe … that’s what I keep telling myself.

Around 3:30 AM earlier my tummy was hurting so bad I complained about it to my seatmate. When Momie Tyneen arrived she asked if she could take over my station during my lunch and I told her about the tummy pain, she went to the clinic and asked for meds on my behalf. During lunch I went to the pantry to eat and took the meds. But the pain didn’t subside Around 5AM when am suppose to go back and start taking calls I started puking, my team lead sent me home.

Kathy accompanied me to Jobee to have breakfast and got home at around 6AM. I was asleep from 6 AM all the way to 6 PM. The pain is still here but it’s manageable. Good thing it’s already my rest day tomorrow. *sigh*

Am not sure if I am all pleased but I guess I am thankful that I still have a job to come home to. Though how long I am holding the forth that I am not sure. Things have gotten kinda hard for me given my long absence and sometimes just letting go and walking away is very tempting. A good friend of mine is leaving the company to do what he loves the most and I envy him for having the courage to walk away while I on the other hand is too much of a coward to do the same. I don’t have the strength to leave my comfort zone and explore the unknown. It’s like history repeating itself. I go on LOA on summer and come back to work struggling and grumpy. What a waste!!!

My Pink Summer Contest is about to end. It was fun and am looking forward to setting up more contest.

Excuse the language but thats just how I feel right now. I just got home from work and its 3AM. I went to work with good intentions in a rush because I was afraid of being late … guess am trying my hardest to be good. I took calls from 1:30 AM to 2:40 AM had I not pinged Dio I would have stayed on the floor till the end of my supposed shift not knowing that am not suppose to come in for work today. My training is scheduled Tuesday 12NN so I don’t work at 1:30AM. But how was I s’pose to know?

Crap!!!!! Am so pissed off and am not sure if am pissed off at myself or at work in general. Am fuming mad, imagine what a waste it was for the cab fare back and forth not to mention how I could have slept till sunrise. Grrrrr….

I was enlisted as part of the bulletin board committee together with Lily and Randy but truth be told I haven’t done anything. Well if you consider going with them buying the material something then that/s about it. I wasn’t able to help out in making the slippers and all that. I asked Randy to take a picture of the finished product so I can blog about it, and boy it sure looks pretty.

Good Job Lily and Randy. Visit their site here.

We’re asked to fill out the Self Appraisal form, the very same one we filled out when we were about to be regularized. Just finished mine and never thought writing “truthfully” about thyself could be so hard. Am not sure if what I’ve typed were enough for whoever it is who’d find time to read it but it certainly was enough for me, the lesser you type the lesser the errors. lol

With the coming season, the team is already planning for the upcoming Christmas Party and the corresponding exchanging of gifts. It is going to be Manito-Manita, Cholee is going to collect our individual wish lists for possible gift ideas soon and am already contemplating on the items am going to include on my list. Being a nerd and a music addict probable choice for me would be books and a music player. An ipod make a great gift but that’s way beyond our agreed amount. Ever since I saw Kitoy’s iPod nano, I think that was the classic one I’ve been meaning to buy my own but I want something more feminine and with much bigger capacity. So when iPod touch was released I readily surf the web and went to a local iStore shop here. A friend suggested that in order to save time and for convenience sake it’d be better to go online to a price comparison site, check on the various models, colors and prices of each units before heading to the store and buying one.

Well Yayen’s coming home next week and she just confirmed that she just bought the 32 gig iPod touch for me, the pink iPod nano is kinda enticing imagine having 2 ipods lol but am sticking with the latest  so I’d take that off my wish list and just include huggables, books from Haruki Murakami (except of course those that I have already) and books from Jennifer Weiner. I so so wanna clamor to read The Guy Not Taken, think I’ll grab a copy so I’ll have something to read on the plane. *winks*

A support engineer called in and requested for a new ticket to be opened for the customer. He also told me that we’re gonna join a bridge call and theres gonna be a lot of people on that call. Whew!! So I said okies, now when he said a lot of people what I had in mind was 4 or 5 people but what were on the line were like 7 or 8 people. Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa and I can no longer distinguish which voice belongs to the customer. lol

Pinged the tech and he was laughing when I asked for his help. lol .. it was not part of our training to join bridge calls so that was a first … yikes!! I said on that bridge call hearing different voices with different accents for 25 minutes (the tech said he’s been at it for 7 hours and counting) only to have the customer tell me that they’d postpone the case creation for now and will do some testing first.

Good luck to my aht!!!!

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

My boss promised me yesterday that we’ll do coaching the following day at the start of my shift. I was looking forward to it actually as I have some clarifications on process and what not.

It scared me to know that one of my team mate was placed on corrective action plan and that I might be heading down that path soon. Never fully understood what’s in it for me, bec the first and the last time I was placed on such action plan they still moved me to this LOB am currently in. If you ask me it somehow lost whatever merit it holds. A friend also said what’d you get if you’ve got good score cards anyway? It’s not like you’re applying for a higher position … yeah yeah yeah … all true but an agent’s gotta have some sort of motivation to keep coming back right?

So we had our coaching and he was surprised on how I state things, the way I understood them. Clarifications were done … I asked him to give me a week to work on something.

I did feel a twinge bad … just a teeny weeny twinge … when I asked my boss if I was one of his outliers during their skip level. Imagine … having been discussed by whoever was there why this agent is not hitting the metrics and all. What a shame?!!!!! Oh well thats their job anyway … yikes!

Am not aspiring to reach number 1 … lol … thats for other folks hehe lets just say am done racing for the top … I’ve had my share academically so am done and out. lol

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Looking at IM, Mitch’s shoutout was … Christmas is just around the corner … and I said hell yah, a couple more months and its December, heck the wallpaper on our workstation computers screams of the upcoming company christmas party. Am not sure what give aways we’ll be getting this year wont be disappointed if we won’t be getting a bag of goods but one of those fancy corporate holiday cards will do. Lets just say a keepsake.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

Had a call earlier from a kid (she sounded like a 10 year old kid to me), she was having problems with a game her momma bought for her. It has been a usual process for us to collect the contacts details and when I asked her for her phone number she said, give me a sec. Then I heard her on the phone … mommy, mommy whats our phone number? then she get back at me and repeated what her mommy said. It didnt have the area code … heheh when I asked her she said I don’t know, my mommy didn’t know too. It was really cute … I mean she sounded real cute good thing her mom took over and gave me the area code and we proceeded with the technical details of her issue. Had she not took over I would have been forced to open up google and search area codes based on her zip code … *sigh* nice job eh?

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

During work nights there are these callers who at times doesnt seem to know what their zip codes are, kinda silly if you come to think of it. How can you not know what your zip code is when your living in that area? An exception can be given probably if you’ve just moved in, some of these callers though cant give their zip codes at the top of their head. The same thing goes with area codes, when asked for their phone numbers they sometimes fail to give the area code that agents like me would be force to open up IE and perform an Area Code Search. *sigh*

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

When you try to be good at the job your doing it doesnt really help when the people around you would just tell you to just go ahead transfer that back to the tech team who transferred the call to me … getch?

customer transferred to tech
tech transfer to switchboard (as issue is beyond their scope)
switchboard (me) understood issue but no where in the resources does it say which dept. can assist the customer further …
colleagues (not very helpful) just said transfer that back to the tech (same tech customer worked with) …

Wasnt very helpful now was it?

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

After working on a presentation for school in Starbucks, I decided to call it a night and head on up to the lounge, on the elevator I saw David and he asked me what am doing in the office when its my RD. I told him am gonna sleep for a bit in the lounge and help out with the bulletin board. He was like … why? are you assigned with the bulletin board?. I was taken aback by his question … is that how these people think of things? I mean just coz someone else was already assigned with the creation of the bulletin board doesn’t mean the rest can just standby and watch … right?

Its a team bulletin board and any help given is highly welcomed … oh well … I overslept in the lounge hehe I was able to help only for a short period of time but at least it was done. Momie Lai won’t go pointing out how barren our spot is compared to the rest.

23 on the 23rd … presents are very much appreciated. lol!

In a weeks time of sleeping in the company’s mini hotel I’ve quite noticed a few things of which are not very favorable.

There seems to be only two advantages to what am doing:

**** a savings of a couple of pesos for the cab fare
**** an extended hour or so of sleeping time

Now the disadvantages … they’re quite a lot mind you.

**** the bean bags are not really comfortable to sleep in
**** am not sure how often they’re cleaned if they’re ever cleaned at all but every time I wake up … my allergic renitis is on the lose.
**** they kinda smell which then again points us back to the fact that they’re rarely cleaned.
**** if you arrive past 8 PM … better head back on to where you came from as its fully booked.
**** the people who are using the computers inside the lounge doesn’t seem to have the decency to lower their voices down (take for instance this person to my left) knowing that its the “sleeping lounge”.
**** a number of the “regular tenants” snore quite loudly, loud enough to wake the person at the farthest corner of the room. Sometimes if you’re that unfortunate an orchestra of snores is on full swing.

Because of the “queue” in the lounge I was “forced” to ask my boss, mitchy and d if I can go half day, I was awake since 1AM and if I reach 1AM w/o having been able to sleep a wink … am dead. Now this is one example why am hesistant to leave the people at work are generous and Mitchy has been nothing but kind and understanding just like any big sister would be.

Am not sure if I’d be sleeping again in the lounge in the next week, am not sure anymore if what I’ve saved for the cab fare (let me check my wallet on that) is worth it.

When I saw this on Jonp’s multiply page I readily commented … that I’ll look for my face and see if its there, a part of me was worried am not included or was forgotten accidentally because they see less and less of me at work. You see these people call me part timer. Am almost always on leave, one VL after the other so I can’t blame them.

She said … even if we don’t see you often you’re still part of the family … weeeeee and I am coz I saw my face on the tarpauline. Yehey!!!

These people made me stay … despite the many temptation of just calling it quits but am holding on … after all they’re … my new family.

Unwittingly I created my own issue. At work there’s this celebration in collaboration with tradition and May is the month of Santa Cruzan – its a parade held on the last day of Flores de Mayo in honor of Reyna Elena. Here’s the players of this “parade”.

Reyna Elena (Queen Helena) – She is the highlight of the procession, the legendary founder of the true Cross, represented by the small cross she carries. She is escorted by her son, Constantine, under a huge canopy of May flowers. Immediately behind her is a float carrying the image of the Blessed Virgin Mary, followed by a brass band that lends the festive sounds to the procession.

Reyna Eleyna will be played by ________ Constantine will be played by __________.

Reyna Esperanza – symbolizes the virtue of hope – the second theological virtue.  She carries an anchor.Reyna Esperanza will be played by________ escorted by ________.

A-v-e–M-a-r-i-a — represented by eight (8) girls all Wearing long white dresses with wings to make them look like angels. Each one carries a letter to complete the word “AVE MARIA”

A . Divina pastora (Divine Shepherdess) – she carries a shepherdess’ staff. – *****
V . Reyna de las Estrellas (Queen of Stars) – she carries a wand with a star. – *****
E . Rosa Mystica – she carries a bouquet of roses. – *****
M . Reyna Paz (queen of peace) – she carries the symbol of peace.   – *****
A . Reyna de las Propetas – she carries an hour glass.  – *****
R . Reyna del Cielo (Queen of Heaven) – she carries a flower. – *****
I . Reyna de las Virgines – she carries a rosary.  _ *****
A . Reyna de las Flores (Queen of Flowers) – she carries a bouquet of flowers.  – Yours truly

So am there right? Reyna de las Flores (Queen of Flowers) and upon receiving this email last Thursday I was amused, it was funny actually, the image that immediately came to mind was me in a long white flowing dress bringing a bouquet of flowers (preferably pink). Then I’ll throw the bouquet of flowers at all the single ladies behind, and of them would catch them and …. oh!! well am imagining a wedding. Back to the email I got, when my boss arrived as was his custom to tap each one of us on the shoulder, I showed him the email and said out of the blue that I don’t like this part coz I have no escort.

He gave me that mischievous smile and said, your wish is my command. Hahahaha … so in less than 20 minutes he spoke with the mother almighty about what I uttered and the next thing I hear was her talking to D, saying that he has to wearing Barong and what not. So there you go, my fault my bad … weeeeeee … but thank God for my fairies and all, the leave I filed for two weeks ago for July 1 to 3 was approved. I had to annoy I few people actually just so this can be plotted and walllaaaaahhh!!! on my schedule now am officially on unpaid time off.

A sigh of relief … the activity would be held on Monday : June 30, 2008 … evening shift and as my schedule is from 1:30 AM to 10:30 AM its basically Tuesday shift for me. But am on leave Tuesday so ammmmm freeeeeeeee from the issue of my own making.

*** D, sorry bout that. Didn’t know they’d actually tell you and ask you to wear a Barong … my bad actually … but kinda funny though hehehe missed those issues they’ve created bout us. Its good to have laughter even though its on our own expense. Hehehe … but still thankful am on leave so you shouldn’t have any issues where am concerned. Weeeeeee … Sorry bout the nagging bout my leave as well … you of all people should know how annoying I can get when I want to. ***

This year is the first time ever for me to greet someone happy father’s day. Being an only child raised by a single mom I never had anyone to call a father figure so truth be told am a bit biased when it comes to fathers. Especially when in the neighborhood I grew up the fathers were not much of a good example.  What was important to me and it still is, is the Mother’s Day celebration but after meeting a few cool dads at work, some were in blissful marriage others in single blessedness found out they’re not so bad after all.

At the office when Ron arrived (his shift was begins at 7 AM) colleagues greeted him Happy Father’s Day and yeah he’s one good example of a good dad I think, sensible person as well, its like a balance of sense of humor and practicality that talking to him at times made me feel stupid and senseless.

But nonetheless Happy Father’s Day to Ron and to all those wonderful dads out there. Too bad didn’t have the chance to meet mine.